One Twenty Five

Twenty one simple days. That’s it. That’s all.

Twenty one days to establish a new routine. Twenty one days to break a bad one. Twenty one days to lose your cravings (I’m looking at you fromage, you delicious beast, you). Twenty one days to create a better lifestyle for yourself. Myself.

A better lifestyle for myself.

I want that. Hell, I need that.

In the last few weeks I’ve let that whatever, I don’t care gene creep back in and take over. I’ll start tomorrow. I’ll start Monday. I’ll start…

Enough is enough.

I’m tired of waking up and not knowing what to wear because everything is too small.
I’m tired of seeing the number on the scale creep up, and up, and up.
I’m tired of seeing my reflection and seeing my recent weight gain all over.
I’m tired of wanting to stay in because people will see how big I’ve got.
I’m tired of buying candy and eating it alone. (Ya… I know)
I’m tired of taking a million and one photos, then choosing the skinniest one to trick people (you are the people, Little Blog)
I’m tired of going to bed at night promising myself tomorrow will be different.
I’m tired of waking up, and then wash, rinse, repeat.
I’m just tired. Of wishing. And hoping. And not committing

But last night? Last night was different. Last night I committed. And not in that bullshit I’m just saying it to make myself feel better type of way. I said it. I meant it. And then today…

Today was Day One. [Always the hardest day to conquer, I personally find]

They say it takes twenty one days to break a habit.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow is Day Two.

And so, as I’m about to head to bed at 11:30pm on this Monday night, for the first time, in a long time, I have no regrets from the day. I’m not wishing, wanting or hoping I hadn’t eaten this, or that, because today I changed. Today I was the person I wanted to be. Today was a good, good day.

And wanna know the kicker? Tomorrow will be the same. As will the next day. And the next one after that. I know that, because I’ve decided that.

They say it takes twenty one days to break a habit.

And you know what? twenty one days isn’t that long either. It’s actually been twenty two days since Christmas. See? time flies. Which means, inevitably - of course, time will tick on, and then suddenly I’ll find myself twenty one days from this moment and have either made a change. Or not.

But I’m making the change. I made the change. It started today.

So what’s my game plan, you ask? It’s simple, really:

• Calorie counting.
• Running/Moving.
• No restrictions on any foods
• No severe, text-book diet.

To be honest, I’m just not going to be stupid anymore. And I’m not going to lie to myself anymore <— that, my friends, is so, so, SO, important.

A calorie, is a calorie, is a calorie. Calories-In, must be less than calories-out.

Simple, isn’t it?

I just want a nice, normal, non-obsessive change. I need a change. So I’m making a change. Sounds easy, doesn’t it? But it kind of is. Decide. Commit. Change.

But. (Oh that but!) I’m not as naive as some of the above makes me out to sound.  There will be slip ups. There will be moments of celebration for birthdays, promotions and weddings (again, that just sounded good, I have no weddings coming up), and then the times cheese just stares me in the face. There will be obstacles. And yes, I may will slip up. I’m human and love food like that. But. (Oh-oh! praise the Lord, because this is a good but.) This time I will keep trying, keep fighting, keep trying to get my old self back. And then some. This time, I refuse to give up.

It will be hard (soooooo hard).
And yes, it will take a long (soooooo long) time.

But for the first time, in a long time, I suddenly don’t doubt that I will change. Because I thought about it (<— for weeks), then decided to do it (<— last weekend), then committed today (this post is my contract with you, btw), and then I changed (<— today!).

It’s possible - to be the people we want to be. Slowly, but surely, we can do it.

They say it takes twenty one days to break a habit.

This is Day One’s Summary:

1,390 calories consumed
3km (2 miles) run.